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| Author | Topic: Today I Am Missing You, Joyce |
| Cynthia Sue Larson |
posted 4/15/02 4:20 AM
Hello, dear friends of Joyce! I am so glad this message board is here. I can't even begin to thank you for creating this and keeping it alive with your love and your messages -- just to see a picture of Joyce means so much to me right now. I have missed Joyce for so many months now, but today I was thinking of her with such love when I asked the universe for advice using one of the stychomancy books I keep here by my computer. I picked up Daphne Rose Kingma's wonderful book, 365 DAYS OF LOVE, to page 74, where it said, "Receiving the Light: When someone you love has died, she will bestow her light on you from wherever she is. The attributes, genius, and talents that were his will come to inhabit you in a strange, mysterious way; his absence will fill you with his presence. In the midst of your loss, this is his legacy. This is his gift. Wait for it. Look for it. Expect it. And surely you will receive it." I then opened up Joyce's book, LETTERS TO BEN, to page 39, where she writes, "Is it a possibility that we do not in truth survive beyond the grave. Maybe the truth is that the ego that motored us does not survive. Maybe death is, in reality, the giving up of the self. Maybe, as long as I remain here, wrapped in self and ego, I must glean my comfort from the memories. Maybe at the time of death the self does indeed die. And maybe that consciousness that continues to live, faces a glorious future, a wonderful future of rejoining the grand scale of consciousness. Maybe in going into that vast sea of reality, one no longer needs the self, the ego. Maybe when one goes into that state, the awareness of reality is so vivid one is able to accept the separation of loved ones, knowing that in the very end one will be joined with and in all of them. With that I am coming to believe today, at least, is that death really isn't the end. It is not a jumping into oblivion. It is Life, vibrant life, total love and acceptance. But the me that is here, sitting at the computer, still longs to be sure that the person I knew as Ben, the person I loved and still love, is indeed an individual reality, hovering near at times. Can I be comforted or happy, if I accept the idea that our consciousness merges into the greater consciousness, perhaps without individuality, and we are all one? I don't know. At this point I do accept that that "you", that wonderful "you" is still living and loving and thinking and being. And that one day I will be with you again, feeling your arms around me, holding your hand and basking in your teasing." I can't read or write this without crying, from feeling all the love. I just had to share this with others who love Joyce as much as I do, and who help to carry her light inside us. love always, Cynthia http://realityshifters.com/ Exploring the ways our thoughts and feelings change the physical world |
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